The state of Kentucky can now proudly boast that it has its very own, one-of-a-kind, Creation Museum. What, you ask, is a Creation Museum? I will tell you, and you will tremble in fear and hilarity. A Creation Museum is a museum, like a natural history museum but not, whose exhibits assume both the existence of dinosaurs and a Biblical creation-based history of a world that has only been in existence for 6,000 years, give or take.
Here you will find prehistoric children cavorting alongside an animatronic Apatosaurus; a Sins of the World exhibit, showcasing why God will visit his wrath on us any day now; and a cross-section of Noah’s Ark, complete with dinosaurs collected two-by-two, the flood being used to explain all those pesky fossils.
This is, perhaps, the most awesome thing ever. Not because it’s in the least bit plausible or sane. In fact, it will assuredly cause secularists’ and scientists’ heads to explode, filling the air of lecture halls and research labs with bright confetti and viscera. No, it is the most awesome thing ever because I now have an image of Moses leading his people out of Egypt while riding the back of a Velociraptor as Pterosaurs dive-bomb Pharaoh and his boys, plucking at their eyes and plopping dinosaur poop on the heads of their second-born sons.
That a subset of Kentuckians will grow up with a severely distorted view of natural history is, and I think the world agrees with me, no great loss in relation to my continued amusement.