Web Design for Complete Flutzes

What kind of schloob is running this site, anyway?

“Okay. First, you need to reconfigure the floozle.”

Chris Klimas — Crunchable founder, Web guru and my ex-roommate — was trying to explain something about Web design.

“Um, what’s a ‘floozle’?” I responded by e-mail.

His sigh was audible through the computer.

Klimas and I have had a lot of conversations like this since I decided to take over Crunchable, and since he decided to let me. I suspect he’s regretted that choice. He probably wonders if a reasonably computer-literate monkey would be easier to work with.

But I consider myself to be pretty handy with a computer, and a pretty good monkey besides. So I set about learning what a floozle is, and how to reconfigure one. I learned how to change a doomach nable and how to upschooz a flibber. I’m even teaching myself how to write up a campharking styper schnook. Or something like that.

Klimas and I eventually realized the site’s schmoozle wouldn’t be rebuzzled in time for the relaunch. So I confidently suggested that, maybe, in the interim, we could set up the whizzy to sproing the yibble.

Several minutes passed in our online conversation. Klimas then said, “Well, I guess we could have the wispy sprounce the yipper.”

“Yes!” I cried. “That’s just what I said! Sproing the yibble!”

Brief pause.

“Um, right,” he answered.

But what he thought to himself was, “He’s such a floob.”

Article © 2006 by Michael Duck